Small alterations

I have chosen to not write about this part of our lives, because it is something that is very personal to me and also to my sister. On Thursday Dec 17, 2009 our lives were changed forever. We all had noticed Millie was not 100%, feeling more tired then usual. Thursday it was time for us to know why. Amanda made an apt with Millies drs office stating that she would like some blood work done on Millie. Her appt was at 2:30. I heard the word Leukemia for the first time at 6:30pm that night. My instant reaction was that we should be in the Temple. I called my friend Kristen and said "We need to be in the temple, can you come and sit with my kids". Without any questions she was on her way. Roscoe and I left for the Temple. I know I have neve prayed so hard for something in my life ever! By the time we left the Temple after 8pm we had a text message from Brady confirming that she had ALL leukemia. I now understand the feeling that you hear people talk about when they say , the world has stopped moving why are you all still moving. That saturday the 19th I walked to the store to work some of this energy off. While I was walking and the cars were driving past me I just remember thinking how wierd that they were moving when MY WORLD had been so flipped upside down. It's a odd feeling. For me and my family our best fighting tool has been knowledge. Cancer is something you think you know about, but you just don't really know until you know. I suppose that can be said for everything in life, wich is why we have one judge. I have ordered books and spent the first few weeks reading anything and everything that I could get my hands on about ALL leukemia. Roscoe and Cyndell did the same thing. There is so many things that I have learned and grown from already through this process. I have learned that I absolutly have the choice to decide how things in this life are going to make me feel.. eventually. We in the beginning of something, all ahve to go through whatever emotion we have to, that is the natural process, but at the end of the day we have to decide who is the boss US or LIFE. The weekend of Jan 17 was my turning weekend, Where I decided Cancer was not going to be the boss in mine and my families life. Where we can not control where it takes us, we can control where it doesn't take us. Moving on to our haircuts. We told the kids on Dec 18 (my moms bday) about Millie. One of the first questions Cyndell asked was "can they cut their hair"? My answer to her "of course". This whole haircutting idea was entirely my kids choice we never encouraged or discouraged. Just let them know that we would support them in any decision they wanted to make. In whatever helped them to feel like they were helping Amelia to get through this easier. We have been waiting for for the go light from Amanda. The girls have asked me pretty much everyday if this was the day. We had it planned for last wednesday, but had to put it on hold a few days so Millie could gain more strength after her transfusion and long surgery day. Saturday January 23,2010 was the BIG day. I asked my friend Jen if she could come out to the house and do everyones hair. The interesting thing is. is the day I called her to see if she could do this, Brady had been into great Clips to get a trim. Jen is who cut his hair. They had never met before. When I called she says "what is her dads name, i think he was just in here"? Anyway..funny how life is happening and falling into place before you even know it. without Jen we would not have been able to do this. I have alot of gratitude and love in my heart for and her willingness to donate her time, love and energy to us. All of the kids have donated their hair to LOCKS OF LOVE. The girls hair is long enough for the wigs (10 inches tip to tip) and then some. Jagers being shorter was sent in and will be used to help with the manufacturing costs. I have never been so humbly, proud of my children. They more then amaze me. They are the best examples and teachers in this world. we should never sell the courage, love, pain, and sureness of our children short. They were not saved for this dispensation for nothing after all.....What journey this life is!The first haircut of the night. Millie did the honors of all our haircuts. Brady and Millie working on Jagers new do.Millie working on her dads hair. He is going to take it all off when her hair is all gone.Off with Lillians hair. Uncle Roscoe was SO brave! He let the 2 4 yr olds lose on him. They both had clippers and just buzzed away. LOL!The back Of lillys hair. GOODBYE HAIR!! Who need you anyway!! Millie was so BRAVEand so AWESOME. She told that cancer she is the boss and cut her hair to her chin before cancer could take it all.She looks and is BEAUTIFUL!! cousins with there new dos.This is Grace , jens daughter. Cyndell and Grace have been friends since kindergatren. GOODBYE HAIR!!She is stunning!! They all look older more mature. I have pondered this and I think it might be because of the choice they made without even blinking an eye. They were never afraid or scared, just excited to beable to do this with Amelia. The entire crew. You all are beautiful, and beautiful is so many things.

Millie with all the hair that is going to be donated in her be half.

Teaching by love ,example and laughter